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The Worst Day of My Life

The Worst Day of My Life

Twenty years ago today was beyond a doubt the worst day of my life. It was the day that my mom died in my arms as we rushed her to the hospital. I was always very close to my mom. I have to say, I was blessed with a great mom. She was loving, funny, sometimes goofy, but in a good way, and may have been the smallest one in the room but when she meant business everyone paid attention.

She was also a great teacher. I cherish many of the valuable lessons she taught me as a child. She would often tell me that growing up she was dirt poor. Then she would tell me that those were some of the happiest times in her life because life was about friends and family and not about stuff.

For about a year prior to my mom’s death my wife and I took care of her. I use to be embarrassed to talk about it but my mom suffered with mental illness. However, I have since learned that mental illness is just like any other illness, it just affects the mind just as a heart condition would affect the heart.

Her mental illness didn’t start, or at least I didn’t notice or even know about it, until a year or so prior to her death. The last year of her life was a nightmare. When she took her medication she was my fun loving mom again. However, when she wouldn’t take her medication she would think she was better and didn’t need to take it anymore and turn into a stranger that I didn’t know that often caused me to fear for her life as well as my own. It was a vicious cycle that most people outside the doors of our home were clueless to.

At one point she returned to work and we thought she was doing better. At this time she decided to go stay at my grandmothers for a few days. Though we no longer participate in Halloween, we did then. We dressed our girls up and decided that we would take them over to my grandmothers to show her and my mom their costumes prior to going trick or treating. When we arrived at my grandmothers my mom was nowhere to be seen and my grandmother had a look of terror on her face. She immediately told me that she thought my mom found her gun she had hidden and was now gone.

My wife immediately took the girls away while I went out to look for her. Almost immediately I found her in the chicken pen lying on the floor. My heart sunk when I saw that she had just shot herself in the chest but she was still alive. I picked her up and carried her to the front of the house. About that time my dad pulled up and I jumped in the back seat of his car with my mom still in my arms. She didn’t make it to the hospital. I knew the moment she breathed her last breath and remember it today as clearly as when it happened. On October 31st of 1996 she had successfully taken her own life.

After this I was furious. I was angry at myself, blamed myself, and angry at the world. My mom was my best friend growing up and was nothing like what she had turned into in that last year of her life. I didn’t know how something like this could happen. Though I wasn’t a Christian then my mom was. She loved the Lord and loved going to church. I often had to take her to church and I hated it. When she was in her right mind she would always tell me that I needed to give my life to the Lord and let him straighten my life up. No doubt my life was in a mess back then. Though I considered myself an atheist at the time I was angry at God. If He was real, and loving, and powerful, why didn’t He help her?

That question leads to why I am sharing this awful story of the last year of my mom’s life and the worst day of mine; because it led to the best day of my life. I soon discovered that everything good in life comes from God. James 1:17 says, “Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.” Though to no fault of her own the last year of my mom’s life wasn’t good, I had a good mom, no, I had a great mom. I had the best mom anyone could ask for. And, she was a gift from God; a truly wonderful gift.

I also learned that everything bad and evil comes from Satan. Jesus said in John 10:10, “The thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy.” Satan is that thief. Through his lies and trickery he caused sin to enter into the heart of man which caused the fall of man, resulting into the curse of sin coming upon man; the same curse that causes sickness and death to this day.

At the same time, I learned that God can bring good out of tragedy. God doesn’t cause the tragedy, Satan does, but God can and will bring good out of any tragedy if we let Him. Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” God allowed the worst day of my life to bring about the best day of my life. Just a few weeks after my mom’s death on December 26th of 1996 I accepted Jesus Christ as the Lord and Savior of my life. Today, my wife is a Christian, my two daughters are Christians, and I have two beautiful granddaughters that are being raised in a Christian home to know and love Jesus.

Some say that people who commit suicide can’t go to heaven. That is a Catholic teaching that has absolutely nothing to do with the bible or any form of truth. My mom’s mental illness caused her to take her own life. In fact I don’t believe anyone can take their life unless they are demonically influenced or suffer mental illness. My mom was a Christian. And for that reason, though we are separated for a short time, I along with my family will see her again-because of Jesus.

We all suffer tragedy in this life; some worse than others. When it’s your tragedy, it’s the worst tragedy. But remember, Romans 8:18 says, “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” When you face tragedy, remember where the bad comes from and give him the blame. Then, trust in the one who can turn all things into good, even the worst days of our lives. His name is Jesus!

Feel free to share this and let it be an encouraging word to others who are facing trials and tragedy.

 
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Posted by on October 31, 2016 in Devotional, Uncategorized

 

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Day 28: The Gift of Himself

28 Days of Christmas Devotions: The Greatest Gift-The Gift of Christ

“Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Hebrews 4:16 NASB

We have spent the past 28 days taking a surface level look at many of the gifts God has richly bestowed upon us. Paul said in Ephesians 1:3, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places.” It would take volumes of books to record all of the wonderful gifts God richly blesses us with. However, none of the gifts is comparable to the gift of Himself.

When God sent us the gift of His Son that first Christmas morning He sent us the Son of God, God in the flesh. John records the coming of Christ by simply saying, “The Word (Jesus) became flesh and dwelt among us.” (John 1:14). The word “dwelt” that John used is the exact same word as “tabernacle” This verse could be translated “The word tabernacled among us.” The bible teaches us that the Old Testament Tabernacle is an earthly shadow of what is in heaven. (Hebrews 8:5). In fact, every aspect of the Tabernacle points to the person of Christ. The Tabernacle was God’s dwelling place among His people. God dwelt in the innermost part of the tabernacle.

Now through Christ, we have access to the heavenly Tabernacle. The one not made with human hands but crafted by God Himself. Through Christ, we have access to the inner most part of the Tabernacle. There is a single gate to the entrance of the Tabernacle. Jesus is the gate and we must inter through Him. (John 10:9). Once we enter the gate we see the altar. At the altar a blood sacrifice is required. Jesus made that sacrifice for us once and for all. (Hebrews 7:27). Through the blood we can now approach the bronze laver where every crimson stain has been removed and we are washed whiter than snow. Now we can enter into the sanctuary where we see the table of showbread representing our communion with Christ, the golden lamp stand representing our walk in His light, and the alter of incense where we lift up our petitions and praises. Just beyond the sanctuary is the Holy of Holies, the very presence of God. This is a representation of the throne room of God; the very throne that we can draw near with confidence, because of the grace of God and the sacrifice of Christ. The gift of Christ made God’s presence available to us all. All who would call on His name and be saved.

God sent us His Son as an invitation to come into His presence. He knows us and loves us and wants us to know Him and love Him back. For this reason, He gave us Himself as the greatest gift anyone can ever receive. A gift of long ago, a gift of today, and a gift of eternity. Truly, we have received the greatest gift the world has ever seen.

This is part 28 of 28 devotions that will go through Christmas Eve. If you would like to subscribe to my daily devotions please PM me your email. Also, please share. To see all of the devotions visit rustykuhn.com

Merry Christ-Mass

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Posted by on December 24, 2014 in Bible Study, Devotional

 

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Day 27: The Gift of Recreation

28 Days of Christmas Devotions: The Greatest Gift-The Gift of Christ

“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.” II Corinthians 5:17 NASB

After God completed His work of creation He looked at His brand new world with its inhabitants and declared it to be very good. (Genesis 1:31). It doesn’t take long to figure out that the world today isn’t very good. It isn’t even a little good. It is filled with every sort of wickedness. As a result of that wickedness we all suffer. What changed the world from being very good to very bad? The heart of man.

The unredeemed man’s heart is full of wickedness. His wicked heart influences every aspect of who he is and what he does. Jesus told us that prior to His return wickedness would increase. Jesus also told us that as a result of the rise of wickedness peoples love would grow cold towards one another. (Matthew 24:12). This is why we live in such a cruel world today. This is also the reason why every Christian should proclaim the gospel that has the power to transform the heart of man.

Mankind doesn’t need a change of philosophical views. Mankind needs a change of heart. A new heart will automatically change mans philosophical views. The very good creation God created has been corrupted by sin. Sin is a deadly viruses that destroys every aspect of man. Sin has corrupted all of God’s creation. Because of this, man has been totally ruined by sin. Since we are totally ruined we don’t need patch work. Jesus Himself said that you don’t put a new patch on an old garment. It will shrink and both will be ruined. He also said that you don’t put new wine in an old wineskin. If you do, the wineskin will burst and all will be lost. (Luke 5:36-37).

If we are in Christ, we aren’t pieced and patched together, we are brand new creatures. Nor, has God poured His new wine, the Holy Spirit, into an old wineskin. He recreated us. We are new creatures with a new heart, a heart to love, serve, and worship God. The old heart has been done away with, therefore our old thoughts, ideas, ways, and goals have been done away with. We are new creatures in Christ.

If we are in Christ we have already been given a new heart. One day, we will also be given a new body. An incorruptible body that cannot be corrupted by sin. A resurrected body. Along with our new resurrected bodies there will also be a new heaven and a new earth. The new heaven will be the eternal home of those who are in Christ and there we shall be with the Lord forever. Truly, we have received the greatest gift the world has ever seen.

This is part 27 of 28 devotions that will go through Christmas Eve. If you would like to subscribe to my daily devotions please PM me your email. Also, please share. To see all of the devotions visit rustykuhn.com

Merry Christ-Mass

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Posted by on December 23, 2014 in Bible Study, Devotional

 

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Day 26: The Gift of His Might

28 Days of Christmas Devotions: The Greatest Gift-The Gift of Christ

“I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13 NASB

This is probably one of the most misused verses in all of God’s word. I’ve heard Christian football players quote this verse claiming victory in the football game. I have always thought, what if the opposing team has a Christian claiming the same verse? Obviously, this is not the original intent of this wonderful verse.

When one looks at this verse in its original context, they will see Paul saying in the previous verse, “I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.” In other words, Paul is saying he has faced the best of life and the worst of life. Since he has faced both the best and the worst in life, he knows how to be content, for his strength is not found in his circumstances, his strength is found in Christ, regardless of his circumstances.

As Christians we will face a whole host of circumstances. Some of those circumstances may be wonderful while others may be awful. However, as Christians, we don’t allow our circumstances to lord over our lives, Jesus is Lord over our lives. Since we are in Him and He in us we find our strength in Him and Him alone. Regardless of what we face in life, we will not be dismayed, for our strength is in Christ and we can do all things through Him, Jesus, who strengthens us.

Just as Philippians 4:13 is one of the most misused verses in the bible the great Christmas Carol God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen is one of the most misunderstood. This classic Christmas Carol was written in the 15th century when some words in the English language had a different meaning than they do today. The word merry is one of those words. In the 15th century, the word merry did not mean happy as it does today. Instead, it meant mighty. In the same way, the word rest meant keep. If this song were written today, instead of saying “God rest ye merry gentlemen let nothing you dismay. Remember Christ our Savior was born on Christmas day,” it would say, “God keep these mighty gentlemen let nothing worry you. Remember Christ our Savior was born on Christmas day.” It’s not as poetic, but you get the point.

As Christians we will have more than a happy Christmas, we will have a mighty Christmas, as the original meaning of merry calls for. It is happy, but also mighty. It is mighty because Jesus Christ was born. Since Jesus Christ was born we have access to God. Since we have access to God we know we are kept in Him and are therefore strengthened through Him to be mighty. For this reason, I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. In Christ, we are mighty. Truly, we have received the greatest gift the world has ever seen.

This is part 26 of 28 devotions that will go through Christmas Eve. If you would like to subscribe to my daily devotions please PM me your email. Also, please share. To see all of the devotions visit rustykuhn.com

Merry Christ-Mass

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Posted by on December 22, 2014 in Bible Study, Devotional

 

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Day 25: The Gift of Beautiful Feet

28 Days of Christmas Devotions: The Greatest Gift-The Gift of Christ

“ How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed? How will they believe in Him whom they have not heard? And how will they hear without a preacher? How will they preach unless they are sent? Just as it is written, “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news of good things!” Romans 10:14-15 NASB

When the angel appeared to the shepherds that first Christmas night they said, “I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people.” (Luke 2:10). His declaration was  that the good news of Christ’s birth was for “all the people.” Later in this same chapter Simeon declared that Jesus came for both the Jews and the Gentiles. Again, He is for all the people.

Jesus didn’t come for a select group of people. Nor did Jesus come only for the faithful who sit in the pews Sunday after Sunday. His heart is that all would come to repentance, receive His free gift of salvation, and be redeemed. For this reason, He told His children to, “Go into all of the world and preach the gospel to all creation.” (Mark 16:15). Peter tells us in I Peter 2:9 that one of the churches primary roles is, “that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” Every Christian is responsible for this task.

Paul said in Romans 1:16, “I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power unto salvation unto those who believe.” If the gospel is powerful for transformation, the opposite is true that if the gospel is not proclaimed individuals, families, communities, and societies will be left to ruin apart from the proclamation of it. If you are saved, you are saved because you received the free gift of the gospel. Now that you are saved, God has called you to pay it forward and tell others so they will not be ruined and undone.

We have already seen so many wonderful gifts that God has given to His children. Each gift is received because we received the good news, the gospel of Jesus Christ. We are greedy and dishonorable to God if we hoard all of these gifts for ourselves. God’s heart is to save every man woman and child so they too can receive His free gifts. Paul said in Romans 10:13, “Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved.” How will they know unless we tell them?

The feet that carry the Good News may become callused, bruised, and bloody; they may become dusty, dirty, and grimy; they may become tired, weary, and worn, but they are beautiful to God. For, they are bringing the Good News of Jesus to a lost world, the world of whom He loves and a world He came to save. Although proclaiming the gospel requires sacrifice on our part, it is a gift. A gift to the world in the name of Jesus. Truly, we have received the greatest gift the world has ever seen. Now, let us freely give as we have freely received.

This is part 25 of 28 devotions that will go through Christmas Eve. If you would like to subscribe to my daily devotions please PM me your email. Also, please share. To see all of the devotions visit rustykuhn.com

Merry Christ-Mass

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Posted by on December 21, 2014 in Bible Study, Devotional

 

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Day 24: The Gift of God’s Temple

28 Days of Christmas Devotions: The Greatest Gift-The Gift of Christ

“ Do you not know that you are a temple of God and that the Spirit of God dwells in you?” I Corinthians 3:16 NASB

In the Old Testament God dealt with people in a physical way. He called Abram out of Ur to go and poses a physical land that God would eventually give to Abram’s decedents. Through Abraham, God created a physical nation that battled and worked in the physical realm. God, through Moses, called this nation to make a physical tabernacle, and later through Solomon build a physical temple where God would dwell and where they would worship. God used this physical nation to bring about the Messiah, the Son of David, God’s only begotten Son into this world. When the eight days of purification passed Joseph and Mary brought Jesus to the temple to fulfill the law. The priest Simeon rejoiced when he saw the baby Jesus. Simeon rejoiced for he was looking for “the consolation of Israel.” (Luke 2:25).

Today, God chooses to use the church, His spiritual house, to fulfill His purposes upon this earth. The church is not a building or a location. The church is God’s assembled believers and each believer is individually a temple of the Holy Spirit of God. Today, the church, the assembled believers, battle and work in the spiritual realm. We bear spiritual fruit. Paul said in Ephesians 6:12, “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.”

When the Virgin Mary conceived, through the power of God, the Angel of the Lord said of the baby she would deliver, “AND THEY SHALL CALL HIS NAME IMMANUEL,” which translated means, “GOD WITH US.” (Matthew 1:23). After Jesus death burial and resurrection, just prior to ascending to be with the Father, Jesus said, “Lo, I am with you always.” (Matthew 28:20). Wow! What an amazing assurance. Jesus was born into this world as God with us, and left this world saying, I am with you always. We have life through Christ, and through Christ we have His presence through the Holy Spirit within us as temple’s of the Holy Spirit. We are never alone. Wherever we go, whatever task He calls us to, or whatever trial we face, God is with us. Truly, we have the greatest gift the world has ever seen.

This is part 24 of 28 devotions that will go through Christmas Eve. If you would like to subscribe to my daily devotions please PM me your email. Also, please share. To see all of the devotions visit rustykuhn.com

Merry Christ-Mass

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Posted by on December 20, 2014 in Bible Study, Devotional

 

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Day 23: The Gift of Bearing Fruit

28 Days of Christmas Devotions: The Greatest Gift-The Gift of Christ 

“You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would remain, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name He may give to you.” John 15:16 NASB

As we saw yesterday, we have the great privilege in abiding in Christ. As we abide in Him, we bear fruit thus giving the Father glory. When we give God glory through bearing fruit our joy is made full, or complete. A part of the joy we find in Christ comes from serving Christ through the fruit we bear. Apart from abiding in Christ, we cannot bear fruit.

Whereas the source of bearing fruit comes in abiding in Christ, the ability to bear fruit comes through praying in Jesus name. Jesus said, “whatever you ask of the Father in My name He may give it to you.” He also said in the twelfth verse of the previous chapter, “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do, he will do also; and greater works than these he will do; because I go to the Father.” We are not greater than Jesus, but we, the church, the children of God, will do greater, or more works than Jesus. We are doing more works since we have been doing works in His name for the past 2000 years by spreading the gospel to all the earth. Jesus said we could do these greater works since He has gone to be with the Father. Jesus is there at the right hand of the throne of the Father making intersession for those who are abiding in Him. When we abide in Him and praying in His name, we have direct access to the throne of God enabling us to bear fruit.

Bearing fruit is spiritual works in our lives that bring glory to God. All Christians are called to bear fruit. Not bearing fruit is a sign of being dead, while bearing fruit is a sign of having life. Jesus said, any branch that does not bear fruit is taken away and cast into the fire. If we have life in Jesus, by abiding in Jesus, we will bear fruit.

How then is bearing fruit a gift to us? First, it is a sign of life to us. Second, Acts 20:35 says, “In everything I showed you that by working hard in this manner you must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He Himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.'” When we bear fruit we give to God by ministering to the hurting and the lost. Every Christian is called to share the gospel with the lost and minister to the hurting. When we give this spiritual fruit we are blessed. We give a blessing and in turn, receive a blessing. Jesus came that first Christmas morning as a gift to the world. A gift that continues to give through our faithful service empowered by Him. Truly, we have received the greatest gift the world has ever seen. And, we are blessed to freely give it to the world as it was freely given to us.

This is part 23 of 28 devotions that will go through Christmas Eve. If you would like to subscribe to my daily devotions please PM me your email. Also, please share. To see all of these devotions visit rustykuhn.com

Merry Christ-Mass

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Posted by on December 19, 2014 in Bible Study, Devotional

 

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